stuff latinos like #2: la chancleta

La chancleta. Say "la chancleta" to ANY hispanic and they will instantly cringe at the thought of it. Ask any Gringo, however, and they will just think of the ordinary: the flip-flop. But the Gringo is mistaken. La chancleta is a VERY typical disciplinary tool in just about every Latino household. Any time a Latino child misbehaves, the mother just whips out her very own chancleta off her feet and either a) hurls la chancleta at the child/husband or b) repeatedly hits the child/husband with la chancleta. In order to hurl la chancleta at the child, however, the Latina mother must first buy a very sturdy chancleta preferrably made out of wood so that when she hurls it at the child, it will hurt. If a Latina mother hurls a rubber chancleta, chances are, it won't hurt as bad as a wooden chancleta.

If it is your first experience with la chancleta, you are very lucky. Most of the time Latina mothers are out of practice or don't have enough experience throwing la chancleta, so they just might miss. But don't get them angry to often or else their aim will improve and then next time you will definitely get hit. But if they choose option B, then you are screwed either way.

An excellent example of la chancleta is seen in the above picture. Click it and you will be linked to a video on Youtube. But if that link doesn't work, try clicking HERE. Husbands and children: you have been warned!

besitos,

xoxo bb

the chonga girls are back!

some veryyy lovely lady sent me the following video, and it was done by the chonga girls. hilarious. these chongas pretty much sum up everything the blog is about.

enjoy!

ps. its kind of funny, to us puerto ricans, chonga means something to cuddle with or something cuddly... definitely not in this sense!

xoxo bb

CHONGALICIOUS!

if you are a self respecting hispanic (or even if you aren't...), then you absolutely MUST watch this!

xoxo bb

stuff latinos like #1: slicked back hair

Have you ever wondered how to spot the Latina in a crowded public space? It's simple. Scan the crowd, spot the excessive use of hair gel (preferably on dark brown or black hair, maybe even with some highlights), then proceed to check for a "burnt cinnamon bun" seemingly attatched to the back side of her head. This "cinnamon bun" look is very hard to achieve so the Latina must painstakingly insert multi-colored bobby pins in and around the hair. Assure yourself that the Latina is not looking while you are examining her hair style; an aggravated Latina is scarier than a lion at feeding time-- so be careful).

It is not easy to achieve this look. What many Latinas tend to do is go to a beauty supply store and purchase a vast amount of hair gel, to store and for immediate use. She then goes home and fishes out her fine-toothed comb and then proceeds to dip it into this newly acquired bucket of gel. With this gel-encrusted comb, the Latina then plasters the hair onto her head, and then makes the bun with the bobby pins. Then with the extra large can of hairspray, she then sprays more than half the can to set her hairstyle in place. The hair is then so hard that you can probably bounce a ball off the head, but this has yet to be proven.

besitos,

bb